The Struggle For Less.

The past few months, the past year really, I have worked avidly to fill the house Kelvin and I live in with the things we love, things that allow us to live our lives out together the way we have envisioned it. Furniture that speaks warmth and life, dishes and serving pieces for entertaining friends, art and photos that relay the love and joy we hope emanate from our family. 

You see, I want this roof over our heads to be our homenot just the walls within which we live. I want our tables, our chairs, our pillows, all of it to tell our story, to become so saturated with memories that they are all too heavy to ever part with.

It’s a beautiful picture, right? Yes. We all want that. Laughter around the table. Love in the bedroom. Bare feet in the backyard.

Yet as the months have passed, while the money has been spent on throw blankets and lawn furniture, pillows and nightstands, I have slowly come to a very simple realization. Embarrassingly simple really, but with lifelong implications. With the propensity and the power to fundamentally change the way I look at my life, the way I consider what matters.

WE DON’T NEED ALL THIS STUFF. 

We really don’t.

The joy, the laughter, the love; they have nothing to do with the things which fill a home. And EVERYTHING to do with where you put your heart.

“What I love most about my home is who I share it with.” {Tad Carpenter}

I know. It sounds like the love struck ramblings of a newlywed, right? I must be in the honeymoon stage, completely idealistic about the joys of marriage, of sharing my life with someone else. As long as we have each other, we’ll be okay. Right?

But no. That’s not really what I mean. Not at all.

This isn’t about marriage. I shared my heart with Jesus long before I shared it with Kelvin. Marriage only opened my eyes to this –> The efforts to “fill” our lives, our homes, they’re never-ending. None of it will ever be full enough, new enough, bright enough. It’s the nature of who we are, the nature of the lives we live. There’s a bigger house down the street. There’s a quarterback better than your son. There’s a wedding prettier than yours.

So here’s the thing. At least for me.

I want less.

Or at the very least, I want to be okay with less. 

Wait. Hear me out.

This isn’t about giving up dreams. They’re still there. I’m going to get them.

It’s about joy, satisfaction, and contentment in these 24 hours. In the days until those dreams are fulfilled.

The things that are SO important for our home? They really aren’t.

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.” {Matthew 6:21}

The man I share my life with? The Jesus we trust? The friends and family we laugh with?

|That’s the treasure.|

THAT is so heavy that I could never part with it.  

I’m learning to be completely okay with what I have, right here, right now. Overwhelmingly grateful for the people I share all of it with. It defies much of what our culture tells us, directly challenges what we hear and see daily. “Work harder. Dream bigger. Think smarter. Come on, keep up. Everybody else is.” 

I’m tired of running.

Instead, I’m de-cluttering my heart.

Reorganizing my treasure.

In wanting less, I’m grateful for more. 

“BE GRATEFUL FOR WHAT YOU HAVE, KNOWING THAT AT THIS MOMENT, ALL YOU HAVE IS ALL YOU NEED.” 

And that’s the big thing, really.

At this moment, all you have is all you need.

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